Six Battles Every Man Must Win

Part 3:  Fight For Your Family

1 Samuel 22:1-2

Pastor Darrin Wright – February 10, 2008

 

 

I.  Battle # 3:  Fight For Your Family.

·         Key Text:  1 Samuel 30:19(NASB)- “But nothing of theirs was missing, whether small or great, sons or daughters, spoil or anything that they had taken for themselves; David brought it all back.”

·         Key Person:   David

·         David and his men came to Ziklag and found that the Amalekites had overthrown Ziklag and burned it.

·         The Amalekites also took captive all of the women and children.

·         Look at how the Bible says David and his men responded to what they found.

·         1 Samuel 30:4 (NASB) – “Then David and the people who were with him lifted their voices and wept until there was no strength in them to weep.”

·         1 Samuel 30:6 (NASB)“Moreover David was greatly distressed because the people spoke of stoning him, for all the people were embittered, each one because of his sons and his daughters.  But David strengthened himself in the Lord his God.”

·         1 Samuel 30:8 (NASB) – “David inquired of the Lord, saying, Shall I pursue this band?  Shall I overtake them?  And He said to him, Pursue for you will surely overtake them, and you will surely rescue all.”

 

·         1 Samuel 30:16 (NASB) – “When he had brought him down, behold they were spread over all the land, eating and drinking and dancing because of all the great spoil that they had taken from the land of the Philistines and from the land of Judah.”

·         1 Samuel 30:17 (NASB) – “David slaughtered them from the twilight until the evening of the next day; and not a man of them escaped, except four hundred young men who rode on camels and fled.”

·         Hundreds of men were reunited with their wives and children.  Every man who embraced his family did so because he was willing to sacrifice his life for them.

 

  1. Fight For Your Wife.

·         Proverbs 19:14 (NASB) – “House and wealth are an inheritance from fathers, But a prudent wife is from the Lord.”

·         Decision:  To value our wives and love them sacrificially one day at a time.

·         A husband’s decision to provide his wife with spiritual leadership and emotional nurturing can infuse a marriage with vitality.

·         Active love and leadership are the keys to a happy wife and a fulfilling marriage.

1.      Sacrificial Love

a.     Ephesians 5:25(NASB) – “Husbands love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her.”

b.     Marriage is a call to die, and a man who does not die for his wife does not come close to the love to which he is called.

c.      Our marriage will thrive if we will consciously choose to love our wife as Christ loved the church and daily put her needs before our own.

d.     Marital love calls for everything.

e.      Christian marriage vows are the inception of a lifelong practice of death, of giving over not only all you have, but all you are.

f.        Determine:  To allow Jesus to live through us and enable us to love our wives sacrificially.

  1. Sanctifying Love

a.     Ephesians 5:26-27(NASB) – “so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless.”

b.     Marriage should move us toward holiness.

c.      This command from Paul is  a husband’s elevating effect on his wife. 

d.     He is to be a man of the word who lives a godly life, praying and sacrificing for his wife.  His authentic spirituality is meant to move her toward the image of Christ.

e.      Bill Perkins – “Our aim should be to love our wife in order to strengthen her spiritually.  We must fight for her heart as we do our own.  Our passion should be to have a cleansing effect on her so that both her thoughts and actions are pure.  We must serve as her “spiritual windshield wiper” – continually removing anything that blurs her vision and threatens her safety.”

f.        Truth:  I am the only man with the God-given responsibility to protect the heart of my wife.

  1. Self Love

a.     Ephesians 5:28-30 (NASB) – “So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies.  He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of his body.”

b.     This means granting her the same importance and value  that we place on ourselves.

c.      We are to love our wives physically, emotionally, and socially.

  1. Fight For Your Children.

1.      Proverbs 20:7 (NASB) – “A righteous man who walk in his integrity – How blessed are his sons after him.”

2.      The sense of security and destiny our children receive from us will fortify their hearts when they face the enemy.

3.      Our children need our blessing.

4.      bless – speak well of; praise someone

5.      In the Old Testament a blessing transferred a good thing from one person to another.

6.      While we may not have the ability to give a blessing of such benefits, our blessings and words of affirmation can pass on valuable gifts to our children.

Five Ways To Bless Our Children

1.      Discipline – We bless our children through proper, biblical discipline.

a.     Proverbs 13:24 (NASB)- He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently.”

b.     Proverbs 22:15 (NASB) – “Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of discipline will remove it far from him.”

2.      Devotional – Teach your children about God, and how to walk with God.  Let them see you model a relationship with God.

3.      Dialogue – Have meaningful conversation with your children on a regular basis.

a.     Verbal Affirmation – words of affection and approval.  (John Maxwell – names for kids)

b.     Physical Affirmation – A hand on the shoulder, a pat on the back, a hug, wrestling with them.

c.      Predictive Affirmation – Words that forsee a bright future that’s consistent with their personal strengths.  It tells them we love them and believe God has something special for them.

d.     Josh McDowell – “Rules without relationship equals rebellion.”

e.      Our love and affirmation will do more to fortify them against the enemy than you can imagine.

4.      Direction – Lead them, guide them in an intentional way; protect them from things that could hurt them.

a.     Dr. James Dobson says there are two things he would never alone in his child’s room if he were raising children today:  a computer, and a t.v. set.

5.      Date – Date your children on a regular basis; build in one on one times with your children on a regular basis.  (story of Katie wanting to go on a date.)

6.      illustration:  the different miles my shoes have gone; children wearing my shoes; cleaning out the closest after funeral; memories of the shoes; what will they remember?

7.      Hebrews 12:13 (NASB) – “and make straight paths for your feet, so that the limb which is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather be healed.”